Dads and Husbands

Originally written on May 4, 2016-

May 3rd marked our 7th month of marriage.  It also happened to be both our dad's birthday.  Seems strange that our dads would share a birthday, doesn't it?  And our moms were born 13 days apart.

I've been thinking about a specific topic that has to do with my dad and now seems like the right time to write about it.

I've often heard it said that women marry men who are like their dads. I always wondered what that would look like, should I ever marry. Now that I have, I can tell you that that saying is very true for me.

My dad grew up on a farm in Texas. I don't know much about his upbringing other than he drove a tractor and he was one of 9 kids. Dad was well liked. He had an easy going personality and I don't think he ever made an enemy. He liked to tinker and work on electronics. He served in the military. Dad was the "cause" of his parents divorce because he believed in doing the right thing (my grandmother was crazy). Regardless, he spent money home to his mom while he was serving, to help her out financially.  I remember my dad always had a smile. I'm told I look like him.  When I was little, dad would pat me on the head and tap my chin when he was happy with me. I don't think he ever spanked me but I do remember one time when he got mad at me. And he was right to do so. 

My husband grew up on a farm in South Dakota. He worked his parents farm until he left for tech school where he honed his love for all things airplane. Joe can fix just about anything . He likes to tinker and is very mechanical. He wanted to join the service but couldn't because of an astigmatism. When his dad had a stroke, Joe left his airplane mechanic job to return to the farm and help out. He bought  land and eventually started his own farming business. Joe is very good to his mom, even though she can't hear him. He calls to check on her and we have her over for lunch on occasion. If something needs fixing, Joe is there. He is a good son. I love his smile. When we first dated, I remember saying something to Joe that he thought was funny. He responded by tapping me under the chin and smiling. Hmmm.

Dad was a short, hispanic man.  Joe is a tall, skinny redhead. The differences end there. My dad was my favorite person. My husband is my favorite person. Thank you God for giving me both. 

Pretty Good So Far

As of today, we're at the tail end of November.  Who knew this year would be as insane as it was. 

To recap:

Coronavirus hit in January.  It "started" in Wuhan, China though there is some discussion about the true origin and date. 

By March, states began to shut down schools and businesses to keep the virus at bay.  In some states, schools never opened again until the new school year. Many businesses never re-opened.  SD  closed for two months.  I stayed home in March then worked from home in April and May.  By June, the state and my job opened back up. 

In July, we went to Montana. Shay graduated from high school and would leave for college in Arizona in August. We were invited to her graduation party in WA but decided to spend time with them in MT instead.  It was wonderful.  We surprised the boys first at Wayne and Rhudi's house. I'll never forget the hug Trace gave me and the look on his face when he realized we were there. Blakely has grown so much. She is very sassy and gorgeous. Davis is tall and has his grown up voice.  Shay is beautiful. It filled my heart to have time with the Millers.

At the end of July, we moved mom in with us. She called in early June to say "they're kicking me out".  Translated - she had gotten on their last nerve and they couldn't take it anymore. Mom and Kelly had gotten into an argument over Kelly's boyfriend about a year prior. That led to them not talking to each other.  At all. Tony took sides.  That led to Mary Ann being in the middle of it all. She reached her boiling point on that fateful June day and said, "Thats it!"  She got Tony to throw out mom's bedding onto the lawn.  I think it started as a scare tactic as he told her he was putting her into a hotel and had called a moving truck to pick up her things.  Defiant, mom called me then went to the neighbor's house where the police were called. When the officers showed up and figured out what had happened, they sided with mom and Tony was made to return her things to her room.  Of course, I was left to make all of the arrangements which I did. 7 weeks later, mom was in SD along with all of her things.  In between then, however, crazy things were happening that mom kept me informed of.  One example - Mary Ann took mom to the bank to get her jewelry but talked her out of transferring her money from B of A to our local bank. She tried to reason with mom that she didn't need to move her money to SD. Um... ok.  I thank God for Laurie who was able to be with mom and help her through this time. She was so good to mom and spent time with her. She is truly my sister. 

Uncle Herman passed away this year. He'd had dementia but Covid restrictions made matters worse for him as he was confined to a home. Poor man. He'd lived a good, long life but still. In the end, he was alone when he passed.  His kids decided to send his ashes down the Rio Grande in Texas. An invite was sent and in September, several first cousins got together to pay respects to this man and the Ortiz family in general. We were able to go to Gonzales, TX for this occasion. I was looking forward mostly to spending time with Nicky, Ricky, Herman, Yoli, Lupe and Anita.  Minus Yoli who is very sick, they were all there.  It felt like time had stood still and I had seen them only yesterday. Being with them reminded me of what true family feels like. The love they have and give is so precious. And Joe fit right in with them. It was a wonderful time. 

November was also presidential election time. What a mess it is! "IS" because its being contested.  Biden won 'though I'm not sure how.  The man has health issues that are visible. There are allegations of corruption and voter fraud being investigated. Only time will tell what will happen in the end and who our president will be. God help us!

The holidays are going to be different.  We just had Thanksgiving, hosting Tom and Mary Jensen, Bruce and Chris, Amy and Greg.  Because of Covid, the high school lunch was canceled. Joe cooked the turkey that was provided by the Jensens.  Pat Taylor stayed home. Season opener was the same.  Fewer hunters. Still, it was good to see the guys who came, even if I don't remember their names. 

The yard has been winterized. We're having unseasonably warm weather which I'll gladly take. But on the verge of December, I think I'm ready for cooler temps and the look of winter. Maybe going dormant will help the virus to go away.

We've managed to stay healthy and alive. God willing, I'll post an update a year from now.