The stress of day to day life on a farm can weigh heavy on any man's shoulders. And they do on those of my farmer. He works without thanks in a variety of conditions that range from one extreme to the other. And it is work that can't be put off or avoided. It takes a toll on him. I see it but there is nothing I can do to alleviate it.
But this weekend, he gave us a gift - time away from the farm. For three and a half days. I didn't realize how much we both needed it until we were away. His concern for the farm may not have left him but the weight was a little bit lighter.
During that time, I saw the twinkle in his eyes that was there when we first met and his look, normally hardened by sun and wind, was softer. His smile was not only seen but also heard and felt. His laugh gives me goose bumps, like a school girl when her crush first notices her. He has a strong but gentle touch; one that tells me he would never hurt me but would remove any threat that came at me. To be close to him is to know true intimacy - where two hearts beat as one, two minds meld. It is a bond that most married people strive to attain and many singles wish for.
Our time was made up of talks about nothing in particular; of holding hands. exchanging glances, little assuring touches that remind us that we are for each other. Nothing significant or special but much needed to keep our lives intertwined. It was about listening to live music, strolling the streets of Deadwood, visiting family and telling stories of life on the prairie.
But time is a thief and before I knew it, we were headed back home. Its depressing and sad for me to think about returning to the farm, only because I know what that means for Joe. He is going from sun up to sun down and comes home so tired. And our time together is limited which makes me miss him. This is the life I have been lead to. I love my husband and will do all I can to support him and grow our marriage while quietly longing for more weekends like this one where we didn't have a care in the world and could just be.
On a side note, during our dating season, Joe would write me poems. They were short and silly but always brought a smile to my face. On our drive home, to pass the time, Joe asked me to write him a love letter. I haven't yet and struggle to find the words to tell him how much he means to me. Instead, we played Hangman. It was the perfect way to end this trip and leave me with a wonderful memory.
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